There are 6 teams who made the playoffs. Four have packed it up for the year but will be invited back for another shot at the Revolting title next season. "Big" Alan Hale and his Redskins finished the regular season in first place after going on an unbelievable winning streak. My team, Porcinis After Hours, fell short in the end after starting the season off with 9 straight wins. Bunch (hefty lefty), Tom (Bremen Wookies), Greg (Bad News Cats), and Mike Spilla (brooksbunch), are the other playoff teams. The Shane "Sizzler" Hardison team, which changed names throughout the season, lead the league in points but failed to make the playoffs. If it hadn't been for my famous benching of my defense late one Monday afternoon, I would have had the points title. I was up by 4 one week on Hop, my long time nemesis, and he had nobody in the Monday night game and my Pittsburgh defense was all I had going so I benched them. All they could do was lose it for me. They ended up scoring 21 points. Shane thought it was bad sportsmanship, but I was just trying to win baby. Turns out I would've whipped Hop bad if I had played them. Instead I won by 4. Anyway, in the end Shane wins the points title. The trophy will be presented at the yearly Revolting Blog Awards Banquet. This year's entertainment will be provided by the famed duo, Bunch and Vinson. We will lip synch old Vanilla Ice and Lionel Richie songs. The Revolting Blog exotic dancers could also make a special appearance. Now on to the stats.
Top 5 QB's
1. Aaron Rodgers - Bremen Wookies - 251 points - top point man in the league
2. Drew Brees - Hops Skull Crushers - 234
3. Peyton Manning - Hefty Lefty - 220
4. Tom Brady - Bremen Bombers - 215
5. Brett Favre - Hefty Lefty - 213 - since Bunch has Peyton, Favre pretty much rides the pine.
Top 5 RB's
1. Chris Johnson - Redskins - 233
2. Maurice Jones-Drew - Hefty Lefty -199
3. Adrian Peterson - Porcinis - 190
4. Ray Rice - Underachievers - 173
5. Ricky Williams - Bremen Bombers - 161 - 6th went to Thomas Jones of Big Al's Redskins. Al also had Ricky Williams until a late season trade for Reggie Wayne. That means for most of the season he had 3 of the top 6 RB's.
Top 5 WR's
1. Randy Moss - Underachievers - 155
2. Larry Fitzgerald - Porcinis - 152 - I've had Larry for 1 week. Got him in a trade with Muddy.
3. Reggie Wayne - Redskins - 149
4. Miles Austin - Hops Skull Crushers - 144
5. Andre Johnson - Porcinis - 136
Top 5 TE's
1. Vernon Davis - Hefty Lefty - 134
2. Antonio Gates - Bremen Bombers - 117
3. Dallas Clark - Redskins - 110
4. Tony Gonzalez - Underachievers - 99
5. Brent Celek - Brooksbunch - 91
Top 5 Defenses
1. New Orleans - Bad News Cats - 144
2. Philadelphia - Underachievers - 125
3. Cincinnati - Porcinis - 121
4. Green Bay - Redskins - 120
5. New York Jets - Free Agent - 116 - The 5th rated fantasy D and nobody owns them. I know Bunch did for a while. Wow!!!!!!
Top 5 Kickers
1. David Akers - Bad News Cats - 118
2. Nate Kaeding - Redskins - 116
3. Ryan Longwell - Dingleberries - 107
4. Lawrence Tynes - Underachievers - 106
5. Mason Crosby - Bremen Bombers - 97 - There was a tie for 5th in the kicker category.
5. Stephen Gostkowski - Hefty Lefty - 97
Top 5 Highest Scores
1. Hefty Lefty - 142 in week 11 against Porcinis
2. Porcinis - 136 in week 7 against the Underachievers
3. Porcinis - 134 in week 13 against the Dingleberries
4. Underachievers - 125 in week 10 against the Bad News Cats
5. Porcinis - 124 in week 6 against the Bremen Wookies
Top 5 Biggest Beatdowns
1. 64 points - week 11 - Brooksbunch goes down to the Redskins 108-44.
2. 59 points - week 10 - Hop goes down to the Redskins 111-52.
3. 57 points - week 2 - Brooksbunch goes down to (guess who?) the Redskins 123-66.
4. 51 points - week 11 - Porcinis goes down to the Hefty Lefty 142-91.
5. 48 points - weeks 1 and 10 - Bad News Cats lost by 48 both times they went up agains the Underachievers. In week 1 the score was 116-68. In week 10 it was 125-77.
Now that I look at it. I'm the only team that made the beatdown list that actually put up a decent fight. My Porcinis squad put up 91 points and still made the list with a 51 point beatdown. Congrats to Hefty Lefty and his band of misfits.
Top 5 Closest Contests
First of all we had 2 ties, which would technically be the closest games. I will list the ties and then the top 5 closest games.
Bad News Cats vs. Bremen Bombers in week 2, 58-58. A real slugfest there.
Redskins vs. Hefty Lefty in week 4, 72-72.
That Bad New Cats tie actually separated Greg from Hop and Shane for the last playoff spot.
1. Hefty Lefty over Bremen Bombers in week 5, 62-60. The interesting thing about this game is that both of the Bombers kickers were on a bye week and Merle didn't pick anybody up to play. You would think that just about any kicker could have given him the victory. I realize kickers don't always put points up, but I can guarantee they don't when they don't play. I can't look it up now, but I bet he had already used his 2 moves for the week and couldn't pick up a kicker at the last minute. Or, like most people, he just figured he could beat Bunch without one.
2. Bremen Bombers over The Underacheivers in week 4, 90-87.
3. Hops Skull Crushers over Team Dingleberries in week 11, 81-78.
4. Bremen Wookies over The Underachievers in week 2, 111-107.
5. Bremen Wookies over Bremen Bombers in week 3, 85-81. The Wookies took the storied rivalry game in a thriller.
How Many Times Did Each Team Put Up 100 Or More Points?
Underachievers - 7 times
Porcinis - 6 times, coulda been 7 if I hadn't famously benched the D that Monday against Hop.
Redskins - 6 times
Hefty Lefty - 5 times
Brooksbunch - 3 times
Bremen Wookies - 3 times
Team Dingleberries - 2 times
Hops Skull Crushers - 2 times
Bad News Cats - 1 time
Bremen Bombers - goose egg
Other Interesting Facts From The League
- the lowest scoring game of the season was Brooksbunch's lowly 44 point effort in week 11. You will find this referenced already in the beatdown rankings.
- Bunch considered changing the name of his team from Hefty Lefty to He Who Hates Maurice Morris after he randomly picked up the Lions RB in week 9 and started him over Laurence Maroney. Morris put up maybe 2 points (I don't feel like going back to look it up), and Maroney put up 14. Bunch lost 104-99 in a game that almost made our closest games top 5.
- Team Dingleberries and the Bremen Bombers each had 4 losses by single digits. The Fighting Shane Hardisons had 3. That's tough luck.
- Big Al's Redskins didn't get a single point from the QB position the last 2 weeks of the regular season, yet he won both games.
- The weiner dog cast a spell over my Porcinis squad that put me into a 3 game losing streak and ended up costing me the number 1 seed in the playoffs. Weiner dog = suck it
- I sometimes talk to Hop via email. He asked my opinion a few weeks ago about some of his WR. I told him to bench Michael Crabtree and play Santonio Holmes because Holmes was going against the lowly Chiefs. He did it. Crabtree got about 80 yards and a TD. Holmes, well I don't remember what he got but he sucked, and Hop lost. Hop missed the playoffs by 1 game. You're welcome.
- It's Brooksbunch vs. Hefty Lefty in the first round. Thumphammer vs. Deh. 8 vs. 42. It should be a battle.
- The other first round matchup is the Bremen Wookies vs. the Bad News Cats. If the Wookies can pull it off it will be an all Vinson matchup in one of the semis. The Deh/Thumphammer winner will face Big Al's Redskins. I'm pulling for Miller to make it to the finals. I hope I do as well and I can get revenge for him putting an end to my winning streak. Although if Bunch makes it I could avenge that 51 point beatdown. Then again if Al makes it I can beat the first place team that overtook me late in the season. It really doesn't matter, because I've just got this underdog feeling in my gut that the Bad News Cats are gonna catch fire and take the whole thing.
